…Elena’s
1st Birthday Party…or my 1st 2 days back at work…
I
think I’ll cover going back to work & wait on the party details for when I
get the photos from our photographer…
I
went back to work this past Thursday…absolutely great advice by the way! If you
can, definitely go back to work mid week! I know this coming 1st
full week is going to kill me but at least I have these two days back under my
belt.
Leading
up to Thursday, understandably I was a swirl of emotion…I would feel fine, then
sad, then excited, then terrified, then confused…all in a span of about 3
seconds. I kept trying to play tough & say I was fine…I think I was
actually convincing myself! I also allowed myself to get caught up in the
details of what needed to get done before I went back that I was able to ignore
the apprehensive feelings.
I do
have to note that I think I have it far easier than most moms, single or
otherwise…so I’m going to try not to sound too complain-y. What I mean is I don’t
have the stress & worry of leaving Elena with strangers at a daycare, I don’t
have the concerns of if Elena is adjusting ok, if she’s getting enough
attention. Since my Mom is looking after her, I can avoid all of that turmoil…hell,
since my Mom lives with me, I don’t even have to worry about getting Elena up
& ready…she’s still sleeping when I leave! I am eternally grateful for the
situation I’m in & will never take for granted how fortunate I am for it.
Because
of all that, I was ill prepared for how hard it was to be away from Elena! I
was a lot more emotional than I thought I would be. What made it harder was
everyone asking me how she was & wanting details of what was new. On top of
that my computer station wasn’t set up yet so I couldn’t even bury myself in
work! Leave it to our IT department! They’ve only known for the last SIX MONTHS
that I was coming back that day but they waited until Wednesday to set me up!!
While I was off, my office was moved twice & I have now settled into a
cubicle so the wait did afford me the time to organize & unpack but my mind
was drifting to Elena.
It
didn’t help matters that Elena has been sick. She spiked a fever Sunday night,
higher than she’s ever had at 100.5…luckily we already had a doctor’s
appointment for Monday morning for her 1 year well baby check up. She obviously
wasn’t able to get her needles & it turned out she had croup…her fever didn’t
break until Wednesday & then Thursday she started coughing up blood!!
Commence freak out for me!!! My Mom took her back to the doctor Friday &
thankfully the blood was from an irritation in the esophagus from her coughing…thru
all of that I am feeling even more fortunate that she was with my Mom & not
at daycare.
Now I
am gearing up for a full 5 day work week…we have had a nice weekend together.
Saturday morning we ran some necessary errands then have spent the rest of the
time just hanging out & me getting some house chores done. Elena is feeling
much better…she is, however, extremely clingy. Can’t blame the girl but I can’t
even stand up without her acting a bit panicked that I might be leaving &
she insists of being carried everywhere. I’m walking the fine line of providing
her reassurance without overindulging her.
And
that’s life with us! Birthday post to follow soon but let me just say, we had a
blast!!
